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" She took a swallow of her tea. "One time when I was around ten, I had pulled my clothes off and was looking at myself in the mirror. I developed early and was curious about my body; and it was neat looking at what God had made me. When, Mama, came in and found me, though, and told me that she was disappointed in me for being such a bad girl. That good girls didn't do things of which God didn't approve." She looked out the window and then back at Jack. "I can masturbate in the dark; or in the shower, but I'm not really comfortable with touching my body; but looking at myself in the mirror and exploring my body the way you asked isn't something I've been able to bring myself to do."Jack was pissed off at her mother for filling her head with utter bullshit, but he didn't express that to Erin, which would served no purpose. After a quick count to ten, he said, "Honey, God sets boundaries for us, for good reasons, but not touching ourselves isn't one of those boundaries. He wants us to. However, as she passed the garderobe, she turned the key in the lock, and then left the chamber, laughing quietly to herself. By the time she returned in the morning to release him from his prison, the intemperate suitor was in quite a state, there being nowhere for him to relieve himself of his full bladder. It caused much merriment among the other servants, who had been made privy to the subterfuge, as he fled down the corridors clutching his privates,in a vain attempt not to piss himself. The maid herself just collapsed on the bed clutching her sides in mirth. I’m afraid to say that it was not long before everyone learned about his plight, and for many days people would cover their mouths and snigger behind his back as he passed. Having tried everything, songs and gifts, and pledges of eternal love, all to no avail because the lady was as virtuous as she was beautiful, this suitor was willing to try anything in his desperation. So it was that he decided on a very perilous course,.
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